Zionist Plots

There is a most simple truth the world is not ready to hear and so I feel most free to write it here. No one will believe me anyway. It could be because they aren’t ready. It could be because their hatred overwhelms their minds and hearts. It could be because I’m just a seal.

Whatever the reason, I feel like I’ve spent most of my life knowing this simple truth so many refuse to recognize – there are no Zionist plots. There, I’ve said it. None, not a one.

There was a dream – a Zionist dream of 2,000 years to return to Zion – that’s another name for Jerusalem. That’s it – the whole story. So a Zionist is simply someone who believes that the Jewish people have a home in Zion, a right to live in this land.

The rest is all nonsense.

There’s a book called the Protocols of the Elders of Zion. I have a confession to make – there are no elders of Zion – there never were. The book is a forgery – it always was.

So imagine my surprise when I saw that in this day and age, the Protocols are on the Internet and are being quoted.

But, since the world will believe what it will, I’ve decided to feed its thirst to blame us for all manner of things. Therefore, I offer you a brief and incomplete list of Zionist plots.

  • The French revolution
  • The Communist revolution
  • The American revolution
  • The Industrial revolution
  • Any other revolutions that I missed
  • The tsunami (any and all)
  • The Turkish earthquake
  • The Haiti earthquake
  • The Iranian earthquake
  • Eruption of Mount Vesuvius
  • Running out of Baskin Robbins Quarterback Crunch flavor before end of football season
  • Overthrowing the Malaysian government
  • Tea Party Revolution
  • Increase in the price of cottage cheese in Israel
  • And more to come…
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